This topic is becoming a series! Here’s yet another unsolicited email mailshot received this morning from a website improvement service; this time from Riley who might be male or female. Actually, this is the third in a set of emails from Riley that started two weeks ago.

Subject: UDM 🤝ben-bennetts.com

Hi Ben – We have a unique offering for ben-bennetts.com right now to increase your incremental revenue by utilizing 100% viewable inventory.

Our approach is proven to drive incremental revenue (Video CPMs are $5+ and rising!). And, our unit is guaranteed to not interfere with UX. You can view our EDGE ad units here: Footer, Skyscraper, Rectangle, Outstream Video, Inline Video, and Double down.

We would love to start working together, let me know if you have any questions and/or signing up.

All the best,

Riley

Let’s take a look at this.

First paragraph. What is 100% viewable inventory and how can it be used to increase my incremental revenue?

Second paragraph. I am pleased to hear that Video CPMs are $5+ and rising! That’s good news. I would be even more pleased if I knew what they were. Similarly, I am glad Riley’s unit will not be interfering with my UX. I rather like my UX as is and would not welcome interference. As for all those EDGE ad units—enough said!

Third paragraph. Yes, I do have questions e.g., what is 100% viewable inventory; what is a video CPM; similarly, a UX; and what is that strange emoji in the subject line? But I may not ask Riley these questions. He, or she, might become annoyed that I didn’t fully understand his, or her, messages to me and start calling me names such as silly old fart, or old codger, or a nerd, or, perish the thought, an anorak.

Incidentally, in last week’s email mailshot from Riley, he, or she, wrote:

We require no exclusive contracts and offer guarantees, flat rates, and a Net 0 payment term. Average RPMs are $2 – $4+.

Pick the bones of that one.

Or, two weeks ago, Riley wrote:

We can offer guarantees / Net 0 payments and white-glove ad optimization services. We require no exclusive contracts and provide an independent auction that finds the highest-paying ad with a 100% viewable ad unit. Underdog Media can help monetize your inventory with unique demand.

White-glove ad optimization services? Independent auctions?

I give up!

(^_^)